Time Passages - and Circles

A great deal of time has passed since my initial visit to Bar Harbor and Swans Island. It doesn't seem possible that over 24 years has passed! I have thought of that trip often, and kept telling myself I'd return. Life takes many twists and turns - and sometimes completes a circle. I will give you a bit of history to help you understand the magic of this spring.

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Phil and I have been married for 23 years and have a wonderful son. We have traveled to Maine off and on over the years, but I had only returned to Swans Is. on one other occasion. Phil and I were recently married and traveled up the coast staying at places along the coast from Kennibunkport to Winter Harbor. On our way to Winter Harbor, we stopped in Bar Harbor and took the ferry to Swans Island. The island still held its rugged demeanor. The lighthouse was in pretty good shape but I couldn't seem to locate the lobster shack.

Jim and I remained close for a time. He played guitar and sang at our wedding, met our son Mike, and became close with my Mom, Dad and brother Mike. We often included him in holiday plans and visits, and Mom kept me posted on his latest escapades......he was a bit of a rebel!!! We'd lost touch over time, but I enjoyed hearing the stories from Mom and infrequent visits.

Phil and I were married on Dec. 20. It was an unbelievably cold and snowy time. There was a snowstorm two days before the wedding and I remember his Dad worrying about getting the driveway cleared. Anyway - I remember remarking to Phil how similar this winter was to that time in 1986. We'd had an awful snowstorm and it just seemed to keep piling up. For some reason, as I was planning for the holidays, wrapping gifts, and coming up with shopping lists for the Chrstmas Eve dinner at our house, Jim kept creeping into my mind. I'd sent the customary Christmas card from all of us and hoped he was fairing well. (The Christmas holidays were always the roughest for him.)

I was devastated to receive a phone call from my Mom - crying - saying that Jim had passed away of an apparent heart attack. He was found on Dec. 22. My mind was reeling with many thoughts and memories. Christmas was a little less joyous this year. He had few that were truly family and so Mom kind of took the reins. He'd always told her she was the Mom and even some of his buddies would call her Mom. The interment was to take place at the Veteran's Cemetery in Vermont sometime in the spring. I knew I had to be there to say goodbye to my friend.

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Life has a way of moving forward. It doesn't stop but only perhaps rests momentarily to remind us of where we've been and, hopefully, guide us to the next chapter. My husband is a designer/builder. A client who'd purchased a summer home in Maine, wanted some work completed so that he and his family could enjoy summer up there. Phil would be travelling to Southwest Harbor and staying for 2 weeks at a time - returning for weekend respites. This would be taking place from mid March through May. I kept thinking, "Thank God school's still in session. I'll go insane with him gone!

It was ok at first. I kept busy with my classes and school. Winter seemed to be passing so slowly......but Mike and I were doing ok. Phil and I talked daily and he was getting a lot done on the project. He mentioned how close he was to Bar Harbor and my ears really perked up! I guess I knew he'd be relatively close......all the towns seem to be connected to one harbor or another......We decided I would go up during April vacation and spend the week at the house. As April vacation got closer I became more excited. Was I really travelling back up there? I was anxious to see how things changed......and if anything remained the same.

I left very early in the morning. It was chilly- but I was fine with my coffee and tunes. I had Van Morrison and Clapton cranked. (I'm showing my age again - I know!) The trip was mostly uneventful. The Maine turnpike can seem to go on forever. I realized I was in Downeast Maine as I passed Ellsworth and travelled onto Acadia. I stopped for gas and didn't have to pay first!!! I saw the signs for Bar Harbor to the left and a sign for the Swans Island ferry pointing straight ahead to Southwest Harbor. I kept thinking........it can't be. I knew the ferry was out of one of the harbors.....and not directly in Bar Harbor.

As I entered the village of Southwest Harbor, I realized I reacognized the main street. Some of the buildings seemed to have remained exactly the same. I was looking for Philips Lane - I had to turn there to get to the house Phil was renovating. There was a new store being put in on the corner of Maine and a new wine shop and deli. Hadn't that been a small grocery store? And.....wasn't the B & B just ahead? Yup. I couldn't believe it. There was the victorian building - still a B & B, currently closed in preparation for the summer season.

Philips Lane was literally just in front of it. I made the left hand turn and three houses down was the property that Phil was working on. What a gorgeous spot! The house sat on a hill and just below was an inlet with some ships. It was so awesome to watch the tides come and go. I'd sit for hours in an enclosed porch and just watch the water.....and the gulls.....and the lobster boats.

We travelled into Bar Harbor. Although it was still late spring some stores were open. All seemed to be preparing for the summer season. New paint was being applied, young wait people were busy learning how to care for customers. Geddy's is still there. It has changed quite a bit since I was there last. It's now more of a family atmosphere....with a fun moose and lobster themed restaurant......although you can still see license plates everywhere from all across the country. Naturally, I had to get the obigatory tee shirt of a biker moose heading to Geddy's for my son. He loved it! The food was wonderful, but then you can't beat the Maine coast for fresh lobster, and lobster stew.

There were several restaurants that had outside seating and even had a warm enough day to have lunch outside one day! That was amazing. The sun felt warm against our faces. It was great just watching people walk up and down the main street - some with dogs - most with children to see what treasures they could find. Several of the galleries were open as were the gift shops. All offered tee shirts and pottery with blueberries etched into pie plates and candlesticks. Some offered lovely photos of local sights including Acadia National Park which is another adventure all of its own. Many water colors and oil paintings of nautical themes were available. It was wonderful.

We travelled one day to Bass Harbor and took the ferry to Swans Island. I wasn't sure I could find anything - it had been so very long since I'd been there. I had asked Phil if we could just gather some shells and small pinecones. I wanted to make a pouch for them and place them with Jim's ashes. He'd loved Maine so and had sold his land years ago. When we drove off the ferry I turned right. Not really knowing - just figured that we'd get around the island one way or another! As we drove up a rise the road forked. It suddenly looked so familiar.

I remembered the house we'd stayed in so many years before. But I couldn't see the fishing shack. We stopped and parked the car and I got out. Not sure if I should......but knowing I had to see if it was in fact the same place - I walked down a hill towards the shore. Suddenly - to the right behind some trees.....there was this weather beaten structure. At first I thought - this can't be.....it's too big. There seemed to be much more to it than I remembered. But as I looked up at it I realized there were still a couple of buoys hanging from the side. It was the same building. The tide was out - as it had been when Jim had taken the original picture so many years before. I did the best I could to duplicate the shot. You can still see some original lobster traps in the shack and stacked outside. The trees have certainly grown and the building not in nearly the shape it was.......but it was there. I gathered some small stones, shells, and yes, a buoy and we walked back up the hill.

We continued driving not having a clue where I was headed. We passed the historical society, the library and the elementary school and the road forked again. I took a right onto what looked like a driveway. It was quite narrow, and there were still trees down from winter storms. I was able to navigate around them and came upon the lighthouse. How amazing.

The lighthouse itself was in good shape. The house was in disrepair but had been covered by a blue tarp to protect it from the weather. (I learned later that it is being renovated.) I gathered pinecones here and took a couple of pictures. We sat on the ledge and just took in the view. It was spectacular and raw and wonderful. The water looked blue and clear below us and the sky was clear as well. The pines looked crisp against the sky and while it was still too early for things to be greening up there was enough color in the grasses to create a lovely picture.

We drove further around the island. It was a wonderful experience and I really felt brought some closure concerning Jim's passing. I had my treasures for him and felt he'd rest just a bit more peacefully knowing that part of Maine was brought back to him.

We enjoyed Acadia Park, the restaurants, the wildlife - gulls, deer, rabbits abound! Strolling through town during the evening getting to the ice cream shop just before it closes and getting a treat.........and enjoying it on the bench in front as they close up shop! You can't beat it!

I love Maine!

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On a final ending note to this chapter - I was able to bring home my treasures from Swans Island for Jim. I knit a pouch and placed the shells, stones and pinecones inside. It was placed with him at his interment. It makes me smile to think that I could bring this to him......I am constantly amazed by the turn of events that allowed that to happen. Life is amazing.